I’m not exactly your star blogger…I’m pretty sure that I’ve talked about sleep constantly on here and I’m often AWOL. Such is life I suppose. I still sometimes delude myself with visions of being a good blogger and keeping up with blogs that I like and commenting and connecting. I think I should just be honest with myself and realize this is how it’s going to be.
Moving on to the real topic. You might already be sleeping by now if you follow this blog in any sort of half hearted fashion.
Sleep. It’s necessary, important, and the bane of my existence. I can’t seem to get enough (I blame school and dumb hospital schedules) or I can’t seem to get good quality sleep (I blame my type A personality, which probably got me to where I am…talk about vicious circle).
Well, this past week was no exception. I usually tend to get a sort of subpar sleep that’s enough to get through life, but this past week was not good. Running around on 4 hours or less of sleep each night, you think I would have been tired enough to pass out after a day or two of that nonsense. Apparently not.
Finally, last night I was able to get into bed early (8 PM – I know talk about a lame Friday night. I’m definitely getting old) and slept pretty decently (by my standards) until 7 AM. I wish I could tell you that I feel amazing this morning, but really, I feel okay versus blah. I’ll take it. It’s an improvement.
So, why am I telling you personal stories of sleep? Because, I think that sleep is affected by a lot of factors. Factors that we don’t always take into consideration.
Why was my already not so great sleep even worse this week? Well, I have some ideas about that.
- food – I have not exactly been eating on a schedule or eating regularly. I got back from my hiatus late enough on Sunday that I didn’t have time to cook for the week. Scrambling to cook while trying to get used to a new schedule and new environment is not exactly the way to nourish yourself. It’s more like anti-nourishment. Plus, I’m missing some of my food storage containers, so I’m hoping I can remedy that today.
- caffeine – I have been drinking a cup of coffee in the mornings for the last couple of weeks, which isn’t my idea of a good time, but was necessary. I’m sensitive to caffeine, which I know very well, but given the circumstances of needing to be alert and not getting enough sleep, I was pounding the coffee. It’s going to be a caffeine wean week this week if I can get everything straightened out this weekend for next week.
- change of pace – I’m on a new service (sorry, hospital lingo…maybe new department makes more sense) with new people as of Halloween, so it’s back to square one and figuring out how things operate and how to get along with new people. Getting used to a new environment often gives me some background anxiety (add that to caffeine and you can see why this is bad) and then subsequently, I’m a little irritated until I start feeling a little more comfortable.
- messy apartment – I prefer organized and clean, but not enough hours in the day (I know not a good excuse) means that often my apartment is not as neat and clean as I want it to be. Clutter and messiness is not relaxing. Remedying that one today.
- unresolved feelings – Sometimes the whole maintaining a professional persona can be exhausting and when you find yourself short on time, you might not remember to go back and process those feelings. For me that means, I stress out in my sleep or have weird dreams.